April Newsletter HealthyLife.Net Radio Show Archive

FEATURE ARTICLE

The Art of Giving & Receiving
by Linda Mackenzie, C.ht., P.hd. (c)

To give and receive in balance, or fair exchange, with oneself and others is a Universal Law that brings positive energy into your life which ultimately extends out to the world and perhaps beyond. Giving and receiving happens to us all, every day of our lives, whether we are conscious of it or not.

There are many hidden reasons why we give and receive. So it is important to consciously understand the how, what, where, when and why of our own personal reasons. Understanding these patterns points the way to stopping negative experiences, emotions and situations.

The way in which one gives and receives can be convoluted with many negative aspects that they may not be aware of. These negative aspects lead to disappointment, unfulfilled feelings, guilt, sadness and other negative emotions, which consequently produce negative energy for the person whom is giving AND the person who is receiving. For example, have you ever received a gift from someone and thought to yourself, "What were they thinking when they got this?" You were disappointed. Despite your "thank you" the giver, whose heart was in the right place, feels your unspoken energy and may even consciously realize that the gift they thought would bring you joy - didn't. The giver feels sad. A truly intended positive experience has turned into a negative and since we are all energetically connected, this negative energy extends collectively to affect the people around you, the world and the Universe.

You can see why it is important for everyone to understand their reasons for giving and receiving. It can transform potential negative situations into positive ones. If someone chooses to be unaware, or continue to give or receive for the "wrong" reasons they will remain in negative emotions and produce negative energy that will follow them throughout their life until realization of what they are doing is perceived by them.

In reality, there are no "wrong" reasons or mistakes. There are just growth processes that help one realize spiritual fulfillment. Realizing your spiritual fulfillment is one of the many reasons that we are all here on earth. So the choice becomes merely how long do you want to stay in negativity and maintain the negative aspects in your life? Do you want to take a short road or a long road to being positive, happy and joyful?

One of the ways to release negative emotions and the negative aspects of life is through self-realization of why one is doing what they are doing. Once realized, truth will prevail and become your teacher. Truth will not release you until you have learned the lesson and spiritual growth is accomplished. You will repeat the same lesson, although not exactly in the same way, until the lesson is learned. Once the lesson is learned, you will never have to go through that lesson again because the truth becomes a part of you and is no longer denied.

Think back in your life, has giving and receiving created negative emotions that have followed you down your path in life? How often was that? Can you discern the reasons? Each person is unique and different. They have their own reasons for the way they give and receive, which is based upon their perception. A person's perception is just that - only their perception. It is based on their innate abilities and experiences (e.g., family, society, culture, environment, etc.). Since you are unique only you can discern your reasons of giving and receiving and why they may not be producing the positive results you want. Think about the reasons why you give and receive. Look for the primary reason or common denominator. Ask yourself this question, "In most cases why do I give and receive?" Finding your primary reason for giving and receiving is the first step to help you determine if there is a hidden underlying negative cause that could be contributing to the negative results that you are getting. Here are some hints, but remember only you know the real answer.

WHY DO YOU GIVE AND RECEIVE?
Do you give or receive because:
- you feel you have to or because it's "expected"?
- you'll feel guilty if you don't?
- it makes you feel important?
- you want something in return emotionally or monetarily?
- you want to show people you are abundant or want to "look good"?
- you want or need to fit in?
- you want or need to feel good?
- you perceive a need or want to be filled for you or another person?

All of the above reasons mask a hidden negativity. They tie you in to attachment to social parameters, negative emotions, ego, emotional need, material possessions or control issues, which contribute to separating you from your true spiritual self. They separate you from the true joy of giving and receiving. They limit you. Each of these reasons takes away the real spirit of giving and receiving. It stops the balance, which is required to attain true positive results from giving and receiving.

After discovering your primary reason the next step is to delve further into that reason to discover why you feel this way and whether it is really appropriate for you. If you are not getting the desired results that you want it probably is not. If it is not, try and initiate some positive changes in your life to eliminate your negative aspects of giving and receiving.

WHAT DO YOU GIVE OR RECEIVE?
Do you give or receive too much?

WHERE DO YOU GIVE & RECEIVE?
Do you only give or receive when it is a holiday or birthday? Do you limit your giving and receiving?

WHEN DO YOU GIVE & RECEIVE?
Do you only give when you feel pressured? Do you come from your heart when you give?

HOW DO YOU GIVE & RECEIVE?
Do you set up expectations of outcomes when you give or receive? Do you set up significance on what you give or receive? Do you set up attitudes or judgment when you give or receive? Are you giving or receiving for the need and desires of the other person? Do you expect something back in return for what you give?

Giving and receiving requires at least two or more people. So to give and receive in a positive way, one must try and discern the other person's perception or ask them their needs and desires. If you only come from your perception, disregarding the perception of the person you are giving (or receiving) from, this becomes a control issue or it may be a way to satisfy your own ego for self-gratification. The "good" that you feel and want them to feel never extends to the other person. You are truly not giving or receiving at all you are only giving and receiving to yourself. There's no balance and a one-sided scenario that can not work.

Giving and receiving should be balanced. If you give too much or receive too much there is not balance. It creates a karmic debt for the other person, who will usually not respond in the way that you want, because they subconsciously will turn away from the karmic debt.

All in all, if you feel unfulfilled and are not getting positive results from your giving and receiving explore why you are not. Then use your newly discovered truths to attain the positive energy of giving and receiving in balance. It will contribute to attracting more positive energetic situations in your life and keep the positive energy flowing on the planet. How great is that!